I spent many years, like MANY women, in a place of "I don't like my body (or myself), I need to change."
It was a cycle I struggled with for most of my high school, college life & adult life.
Maybe you're familiar with it:
Talk negatively about yourself & your body.
Attach your worth to your size.
Beat yourself up for how you eat, drink too much & don't workout.
also, call myself names like lazy, gross, etc.
And from that headspace, l'd try the newest fad.
(Special K Diet, Low Carb, Fat Free Snacks, 100 Cal Packs, Atkins, Points System, Container System, Slimfast, South Beach Diet, Grapefruit & Egg Diet, Gum or Soda to keep myself from eating, Cleanses.../ could keep going.)
And it would lead to one of the following:
Change occured but it was not sustainable.
Quit when change didn't happen fast enough.
I would "slip up," beat myself up for not being able to stick to it & this typically would lead to binging.
(Pro Tip: binging comes from restriction)
Eventually, I would revert back to familiar habits, try another fad & repeat this cycle.
Sound familiar?
The changes to my body post kids brought on a new desire to find real lasting change.
And I found it in the LEAST expected way. The more I practiced it, the more I realized it was the missing piece. And it wasn't a specific diet or a certain workout.
It was the story I told myself that needed to change.
My lack of belief in me & my self-worth kept me stuck. And my ability to see that lasting change comes from a place of love, not lack gave me freedom. I started practicing being kinder & more compassionate with myself. And rewriting my story.
Changes to my body came without pressure.
I stopped eating my feelings, eating until I was miserable & full.
And binging from restriction. I stopped telling myself what l had to do and did what someone
who gave a damn about themselves would do.
The new habits I formed were in alignment with my life.
I was no longer in a hurry.
I became more accepting of the person I was in the moment.
I no longer had to hurry & change to feel better. I gave myself the gift of acceptance & self love which led to feeling better in the moment. I realized I was a worthy human no matter the shape or size of my body AND I could still create change, IF I wanted.
Accepting where you are AND wanting change can coexist. If you don't do the work on the inside, you will always repeat the same cycles. In any area of your life, not just around your body.